![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Love is in the Air
Feb. 13th, 2006 10:16 amWhat better way to celebrate Valentine's Day than to celebrate it by looking through some of the spam I have? Thankfully, one old university account and a business account means I have much to peruse from. So, to quote Gilbert:
Medicines before Valentine Day !!!
Peter writes: Any med for your girl to be happy!
"Oh, honey! Some atarax and a side of Zoloft! I love you!"
I can see this as a very romantic interlude in someone's day. Coming home for Valentine's Day and showing her you care by getting her prescription medicine. They could make a beautiful romantic movie out of it. It'd be called, "Trainspotting 2."
Payday Loans writes: Have the cash to get her something special this Valentine's Day?
Diamonds are forever. Your unbroken legs, your interlude with big Vinnie, and your organs staying in the black market, however, are not. Eh, what's a kidney or two?
Darryl Eddy writes: Valentines Day - our R0lex!
Who knew that Valentine's Day would mean getting offered a R0lex to offer someone else? People sure are nice. Especially when all they want is the information for your name, address, social security, two forms of credit card, and your bank account number! Wow!
Unfortunately, this is the end of my Valentine's email endeavors. :( But do not fret, for there's always something in the email that has something to do with that which is the day of looove. Like:
hot girls looking for a bootycall
Hot female cobblers!
barely legal babes in action
Underpaid immigrant women!
SEKSUALLLY E}{PLICIT: glorious russian bitchhes in action
Dog shows!
Your lady will be stupefied by your sexual performanceSuper Viagra.
Dialogue from future superhero movies!
Ladies to get you satiated!
Women that will feed me!
Cute blonde babe spreading
Preowned bed sheets!
Yes, this to me is what Valentine's Day truly represents in that special way that only email spam can fulfill. The most touching of this wondrous occasion can only be summed up with one more email:
Stop Premature Ejaculation
Because we don't know what other criminal acts he could commit.
Medicines before Valentine Day !!!
Peter writes: Any med for your girl to be happy!
"Oh, honey! Some atarax and a side of Zoloft! I love you!"
I can see this as a very romantic interlude in someone's day. Coming home for Valentine's Day and showing her you care by getting her prescription medicine. They could make a beautiful romantic movie out of it. It'd be called, "Trainspotting 2."
Payday Loans writes: Have the cash to get her something special this Valentine's Day?
Diamonds are forever. Your unbroken legs, your interlude with big Vinnie, and your organs staying in the black market, however, are not. Eh, what's a kidney or two?
Darryl Eddy writes: Valentines Day - our R0lex!
Who knew that Valentine's Day would mean getting offered a R0lex to offer someone else? People sure are nice. Especially when all they want is the information for your name, address, social security, two forms of credit card, and your bank account number! Wow!
Unfortunately, this is the end of my Valentine's email endeavors. :( But do not fret, for there's always something in the email that has something to do with that which is the day of looove. Like:
hot girls looking for a bootycall
Hot female cobblers!
barely legal babes in action
Underpaid immigrant women!
SEKSUALLLY E}{PLICIT: glorious russian bitchhes in action
Dog shows!
Your lady will be stupefied by your sexual performanceSuper Viagra.
Dialogue from future superhero movies!
Ladies to get you satiated!
Women that will feed me!
Cute blonde babe spreading
Preowned bed sheets!
Yes, this to me is what Valentine's Day truly represents in that special way that only email spam can fulfill. The most touching of this wondrous occasion can only be summed up with one more email:
Stop Premature Ejaculation
Because we don't know what other criminal acts he could commit.
